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Monday, April 21, 2008

Sad

This was a rough couple of days. I woke up at 3:00 A.M crying my eyes out missing my dog Cymba who died almost three years ago. Poor Tim, I woke him up crying telling him I missed Cymba,and proceeded to ball my eyes out. He of course thought I was insane. Now that we are awake we both feel I wasn't crying over Cymba that it was pure mourning for the baby.

I have a confession to make, I am sad allot lately. I am either keeping myself busy to the point of exhaustion or sleeping my days away. I am not sleeping at night at all. I toss and turn all night long. I don't think I have ever really been sad like this and I don't know what to do. I actually thought of smoking today!!! I haven't thought of smoking in 5 years. It isn't going to happen but I actually thought it would feel really good to blow out some smoke...

I am ready to pack up and run away... ... ... Please Keep us in your prayers.
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2 comments:

dnd82001 said...

I wish I had some magincal words to help ease your pain..... I don't, but please take comfort in knowing that it will get better but it takes time for the pain to stop and time to heal. None of this is easy - for anyone of us no matter what paths we take it always seems to have bumps of doubt and holes filled with the what if's?

Don't beat yourself up - these are your feelings & you are entitlted to them. Take time for yourself & it will get better - I promise!!

Darlene

April 22, 2008 at 7:48 PM
Gretchen said...

Darlene is right. This is going to take time. You have to mourn this loss. Time will ease it. I am thinking of you. :)

April 22, 2008 at 9:55 PM

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